Gratitude and Why it Matters in Motherhood

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Gratitude is a powerful spiritual practice. If you don’t already have a gratitude practice, start one now. It will change your life. And, ultimately, change the lives of your children.

Gratitude is not only a beautiful practice for focusing on what is right in your world, but it also connects you with the source of abundance and helps you reconnect with the flow of life.

I like to call gratitude the back door to abundance.

You see, when you generate the expansive energy of gratitude, you are connected to source. Gratitude is at the same energetic frequency as abundance.

When you are dissatisfied, you generate contracted energy and disconnect from source. You create a kink in the hose so to say. Contraction is at the same energetic frequency as lack.

This is why it is so important for us, as mothers, to teach our children how to shift their thoughts from dissatisfaction to gratitude. I learned the hard way that I was teaching my children how to live a contracted life. I learned that they were learning how to navigate life by watching me. It was a painful lesson.

Below are a few practices I have incorporated into our family life. I am not perfect but I really do try to walk the walk with my kids.

  • I let them catch me writing in my gratitude journal

  • I encourage them to write in their own

  • I shift my thoughts from dissatisfaction to gratitude verbally so they can hear my thought process

And, years ago when my children were little, I started a bedtime ritual that I call the Grateful Prayer. Each night, I invite them to come up with 3 things they are grateful for. Sometimes (actually often), their gratitude consists of mommy and daddy but I always encourage them to reach a little deeper. To think about their day and remember all the goodness.

I invite you to incorporate one or a few of these practices into your family life and share your experience with a comment below.

Shine Brightly,

Tracy

P.S. Do you need help shifting your thoughts from dissatisfaction to gratitude? I’ve created a FREE Daily Affirmation E-course to support you in seeing all the goodness life has to offer. Click the button below to get started.


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Claim it Until You BEcome it

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You are worthy of every good thing life has to offer and you must believe it in order to BEcome the woman you are envisioning. You don't have to be, or do or acquire anything to be more deserving than you are right now.

Years ago, before I turned my life upside down, I didn’t believe this to be true. I didn’t believe that I was worthy of all the goodness life has to offer. I believed the goodness was there for others, but not for me.

And then, after many years of soul searching, I discovered the late great Louise Hay and the power of affirmations. I learned that I didn’t have to prove anything to anyone to be more worthy. I simply had to believe it. Simple, yet not easy…

Affirmations are a powerful way to write your new story. To claim it. I AM that I AM.

It’s not fake it until you make it, its Claim It Until You BEcome It.

Affirmations are more than just words though. You have to get in touch with the feeling of each
affirmation as you say it.

How does it feel to be you when you say I AM worthy, for instance? Feel the expansion of that powerful statement. Your higher self hears the feeling of the affirmation. Not the words alone.

Believing in yourself is the first step in BEcoming the very best version of you. It takes practice and a will to change your perspective of yourself. And, I am living proof that you can.

BTW - Your children will thank you one day. Not necessarily with words but by the people they BEcome.

Shine Brightly,

Tracy

P.S. Do you need help believing in yourself? I’ve created a FREE Daily Affirmation E-course to support you in Claiming It Until You BEcome It. Click the button below to get started.


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FREE Daily Affirmation E-Course


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Freedom to Choose

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Our forefathers had a vision. 

They decided on the vision. 

They believed in the vision. 

They took action on the vision.

They built a support structure to protect the vision.

And, this week, we will be celebrating the 243rd birthday of the declaration of that vision.  The Declaration of Independence.  A declaration of freedom.

As we celebrate with fireworks, parades and festive gatherings, I’d like to invite you to celebrate yourself as well.

your life

your vision

your freedom

I invite you to draw up your own declaration.  Your own vision.


Try this:

Listen to your longings and discontent

Decide what you would love to be or do or have

Take action 


You have the freedom to free yourself.  To free yourself from the chains that hold you back from being all you are here to be.    

The time is now!  Declare it!

Shine Brightly,

Tracy


Do you need help drawing up your own vision?  Start here.  Studies show that daily affirmations can help reduce stress, boost well-being and increase confidence.  Click the Daily Affirmations button below and get Life By Design Daily Affirmations in your inbox.  Designed with care to remind you of who you are, what you are capable of and how much you rock.  (The first one is the most important.)  Enjoy!


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Going With the Flow of Life

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Have you ever thought about why life seems to be easier for some and not for others?  I contemplated this question A LOT in my “former” life.  I related mostly with the latter.  I would look at the lives of others and wonder “Hey, what do they have that I don’t?”

It took me many years of paddling upstream to realize that I have everything I need to go with the flow.  I just wasn’t allowing it.  And, let me tell you, if you are not allowing yourself to go with the flow you will get tired.  You will get discouraged.  You will feel as if everyone else has the keys to the kingdom except you.  Well, that’s how I used to feel anyway…   

I had the opportunity, thanks to a beautifully generous friend, to learn how to paddle board recently.  The surface of the lake was smooth as silk for most of the day and it was easy to position myself on the board and even do a downward facing dog (and plank to show off!). 

It took some getting used to but with my friend’s guidance, I was able to maneuver easily and quickly learned that when I allowed myself to go with the flow (with the wind and the current) it was easy to cross the lake.  And, when I turned in the other direction it was as if I was paddling upstream.  It became more difficult and took longer for me to get where I wanted to go.

This is how life can be.  This is the difference between natural and normal.  Natural is going with the flow.

  •  The flow of your own life. 

  • The flow of your own desires. 

  • The flow of what lights you up.

Normal is the way we are trained to think.  And, it is usually with a lack mind set. We are trained to think that life is challenging and difficult. We are trained to think that it must be a certain way.

Because of social conditioning, we often choose the hard way, the way of lack, the way of struggle, paddling upstream instead of going with the flow and riding the current of abundance that is right there at our fingertips. 

We will experience challenges at times. This is a given in life in this human form.

We will have to work hard at times. This is how we reach our goals.

In those in between times, I invite you to begin aligning yourself with the flow of your own life.

  • Decide for a vision of a life that lights you up

  • Believe that you will BEcome the woman in your vision

  • Take action in the direction of your vision

Shine Brightly,

Tracy

P.S. Do you need help going with the flow? I’ve created a complimentary series of beautifully simple daily affirmations to remind you of who you are, all that you are capable of and just how much you rock.


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Life by DesignDaily Affirmations


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How to Use Your Discontent to Thrive in Motherhood

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It’s no secret that being a mother is challenging.  In fact, in my opinion, it is THE hardest job in the world.

There was a time, early on, when I focused solely on my woes and all of the difficulties I faced as a mother.  Anyone who knew me at that time may have thought that I was a raving lunatic. 

That’s exactly how I felt.  I hadn’t fully healed from the trauma surrounding my oldest child’s birth and, dang it, having 2 children under 2 is Just. Plain. Hard.

I had mastered my discontent.  I knew it well.  I began my day with it and sealed it into my dreams at night. 

Little did I know, there is an easy way out.  I learned through a series of trial and error that I could actually use my discontent as the driver to move my life in a new direction. 

Think of it this way.  We tend to create change in our lives in 2 ways. 

Intention from – moving away from our discontent. 

Intention toward – moving in the direction of a desired outcome.

Since many of us begin with intention from, I’ve created an easy 3 step process below to help you use your discontent to thrive in motherhood. 

Try this:

  1. Name Your Discontent:  What?  “I thought I was supposed to be reciting words of joy and positivity”, you may be saying to yourself.  Well, you heard me right.  As the late Louise Hay was known to say “you have to see the dirt in order to clean the house”.  It’s the same with your discontent.  Shine the light on it.  Take a look at it.  And then, write it out.  Line by line.  Name your discontent.

  2. Intention Toward:  Take each discontent and turn it into an intention toward.  I’ll give you a few examples to get you started.  Let’s say one of your discontents is “I’m exhausted”.  What you may really want is some energy to get you through the day.  Instead of saying “I’m exhausted”, you could say “I feel energetic throughout the day”, or whatever wording feels right for you.

  3. Take a Step:  Now that you have created an intention toward, make a list of steps you could take to feel more energetic throughout the day.  If the step feels too big, break it down into smaller steps.  Choose ONE step and integrate it into your life before moving on to the next.  For example: 

  • go to bed earlier

  • reduce sugar intake

  • take a brisk walk

  • solicit help

What is one step you can take using the process above?  Please share with a comment below.

Shine Brightly,

Tracy

*Do you need help turning your discontent into an intention toward?  I’ve created an easy cheat sheet to help you.  Download it for free using the button below.


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How to Use Your Discontent to Thrive in Motherhood Work Sheet


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10 Best Parenting Quotes

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I hope these quotes resonate with you as much as they do with me.   

Shine Brightly,

Tracy


There is no such thing as a perfect parent.  So just be a real one.  ~ Sue Atkins
Don’t worry that children never listen to you, worry that they are always watching you.  ~ Robert Fulghum
The best kind of parent you can be is to lead by example.  ~ Drew Barrymore
Being a mother is learning about strengths you didn’t know you had and dealing with fears you didn’t know existed.  ~ Linda Wooten
Your kids watch you for a living.  It’s their job; it’s what they do.  That’s why it’s so important to try your best to be a good role model.  ~ James Lehman
It is not what you do for your children, but what you have taught them to do for themselves that will make them successful human beings.  ~ Ann Landers
It's not only children who grow. Parents do too. As much as we watch to see what our children do with their lives, they are watching us to see what we do with ours. I can't tell my children to reach for the sun. All I can do is reach for it myself. ~ Joyce Maynard
Treat a child as though he already is the person he’s capable of becoming.  ~ Haim Ginott
If there is anything that we wish to change in the child, we should first examine it and see whether it is not something that could better be changed in ourselves.  ~ Carl Jung
Little eyes ears and hearts are always watching and learning how to navigate life through you.  Let them see you not just survive but thrive.  ~ Tracy Nolin Beerman

Do you need help being all you can be?  Studies show that daily affirmations can help reduce stress, boost well-being and increase confidence.  Click the Daily Affirmations button below and get Life By Design Daily Affirmations in your inbox.  Designed with care to remind you of who you are, what you are capable of and how much you rock.  (The first one is the most important.)  Enjoy!

Motherhood is a Spiritual Journey

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Children open our hearts to more love and compassion than we ever thought possible.  They also open our hearts to vulnerability, fear and overwhelm like we've never experienced before. 

Motherhood is a spiritual journey.  It is “full catastrophe living” at its finest (thank you Jon Kabat-Zinn).  

I wouldn’t have believed it if you told me before I had them.  No one can quite prepare you for the beauty, the fear and everything in between. 

Nothing in life brings up our unresolved fears, hurts, anger, sadness, resentment, insecurities, trauma, abuse…like motherhood.  All of our wants, needs and shortcomings from childhood come screeching forward.

You see, our children are our greatest teachers.  They are mirrors into our souls.  They push our buttons and show us what we need to work on.  They give us unlimited opportunities for growth. 

We can either resist what they are here to teach us or we can accept the challenge.  Shine the light of awareness on what they are showing us and take the steps necessary to BEcome the role models they deserve.  One Foot Up at a time. 

It is a choice we all have.  Accept the challenge or resist it.

I chose to accept the challenge. 

It is a work in progress.  I am a work in progress.  It is an everyday, all day job.

It is the single most rewarding decision I have ever made for myself, my family and everyone I encounter.

I am doing it and so can you. 

Shine Brightly,

Tracy


Are you ready to take accept the challenge?  My journey began with daily affirmations.  Studies show that daily affirmations can help reduce stress, boost well-being and increase confidence.  Click the Daily Affirmations button below and get Life By Design Daily Affirmations in your inbox.  Designed with care to remind you of who you are, what you are capable of and how much you rock.  (The first one is the most important.)  Enjoy!

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Free Yourself

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Our forefathers had a vision. 

They decided on the vision. 

They believed in the vision. 

They took action on the vision.

They built a support structure to protect the vision.

And, this week, we will be celebrating the 242nd birthday of the declaration of that vision.  The Declaration of Independence.  A declaration of freedom.

As we celebrate with fireworks, parades and festive gatherings, I’d like to invite you to celebrate yourself as well.

your life

your vision

your freedom

I invite you to draw up your own declaration.  Your own vision.


Try this:

Listen to your longings and discontent

Decide what you would love to be or do or have

Take action 


You have the freedom to free yourself.  To free yourself from the chains that hold you back from being all you are here to be.    

The time is now!  Declare it!

Shine Brightly,

Tracy


Do you need help drawing up your own vision?  Start here.  Studies show that daily affirmations can help reduce stress, boost well-being and increase confidence.  Click the Daily Affirmations button below and get Life By Design Daily Affirmations in your inbox.  Designed with care to remind you of who you are, what you are capable of and how much you rock.  (The first one is the most important.)  Enjoy!


Photo Credit:  Mike Watson Dreamstime

Cultivating Worthiness

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At the end of a talk I gave recently, one of the participants asked me what I did to begin changing my life.  On my ride home that night I realized that I never really answered the question.  I answered the why – my son showed me that he needed me to be an empowered role model.  Not the what. 

After giving it some thought it was clear to me that the very first place I started was by increasing my sense of worthiness.  Hands down.  I HAD to believe I was worthy of a better life or I would never have been able to make the changes necessary. 

  • I would not have been able to let go of what no longer served me. 
  • I would not have been able to put myself and my self-care first. 
  • I would not have been able to establish boundaries and teach others how to treat me. 

It was uncomfortable. It was painful.  It upset my loved ones who had been so used to me being a certain way. 

Saying yes when I really wanted to say no.  Putting everyone else first. 

Holding my tongue when I had something important to say.  Being what others wanted me to be instead of being authentically me. 

Eventually the dust settled.  I became more comfortable in my new way of being.  My loved ones became more comfortable with my new way being. 

Once I changed my inner world, my outer world began to change.  I noticed books on my husband’s book shelf that I never thought he’d choose.  My mother, who I had been badgering to make a move, decided to move to town.  My dad and I began a new relationship with each other.  My tribe began to show up. 

It all began with this daily affirmation:  I AM Worthy. 

I read this affirmation day and night.  Night and day.  Until I believed it.  Until I understood that my worthiness comes from inside and that I didn’t need anything to be more worthy than I already was.

I still use affirmations.  All day.  Every day.  Because I am human and sometimes I forget that I am worthy just the way I am. 

And so are you.

Shine Brightly,

Tracy


Do you need help cultivating worthiness?  Studies show that daily affirmations can help reduce stress, boost well-being and increase confidence.  Click the Daily Affirmations button below and get Life By Design Daily Affirmations in your inbox.  Designed with care to remind you of who you are, what you are capable of and how much you rock.  (The first one is the most important.)  Enjoy!


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True Power

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True Power is living from possibility.

True Power is loving yourself warts and all.

True Power is shifting into greatness.

True Power is knowing your absolute yes and your absolute no.

True Power is celebrating yourself.

True Power is creating new patterns.

True Power is self-awareness.

True Power is taking inspired action.

True Power is living from gratitude.

True Power is knowing and honoring who you are.

True Power is filling your cup first.

True Power is listening to and acting on your inner wisdom.

True Power is allowing abundance.

True Power is making time for laughter.

True Power is committing to yourself.

True Power is recommitting to yourself.

True Power is recommitting to yourself again.

Shine Brightly,

Tracy

What does true power mean to you?


Do you need help realizing your true power?  Studies show that daily affirmations can help reduce stress, boost well-being and increase confidence.  Click the Daily Affirmations button below and get Life By Design Daily Affirmations in your inbox.  Designed with care to remind you of who you are, what you are capable of and how much you rock.  (The first one is the most important.)  Enjoy!


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Choose Joy

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We create the life we lead. Whether we mean to or not. Oftentimes, we create it exactly the way we did yesterday, the year before and the year before that. Like Ground Hog Day. Over and over and over again. The people and circumstances may change slightly but we still have the same life.

  • the same health
  • the same relationships
  • the same job

We may give our circumstances a face-lift.  But in essence, we stick with the pattern that has been ingrained in us, the pattern we have ingrained in ourselves. Our minds love patterns.

We create the life we lead by the thoughts we think. Simple but true. If we ever wonder where our focus is, we need no more than to look at our lives.

Circumstances are circumstances. They are simply what happens around us.

  • Thoughts.  About circumstances.  Create feelings.

  • Feelings generate actions.

  • Actions produce results.

  • Results are the lives we lead.

Good News!!! We have complete control over our thoughts. In fact, our thoughts are the only thing in life that we have complete control over.

It starts with noticing what you’re noticing.  A feeling is often the first indication of a thought you are having. 


Try this…

  • Identify a familiar feeling you have had (Ex. Anger, frustration, overwhelm)

  • Trace the feeling back to a thought.

  • Choose an expansive thought.  Choose to become interested in gratitude, joy or beauty.

  • Notice how the new thought feels.

  • Wash.Rinse.Repeat.   


Try this with all of your undesirable thoughts. It takes practice but it will change your life. One thought at a time.

You need to learn how to select your thoughts just the same way you select your clothes every day. This is a power you can cultivate. If you want to control things in your life so bad, work on the mind. That's the only thing you should be trying to control.
~ Elizabeth Gilbert

Shine Brightly,

Tracy


Do you need help imagining what you would love?  Studies show that daily affirmations can help reduce stress, boost well-being and increase confidence.  Click the START HERE button below and get Life By Design Daily Affirmations in your inbox.  Designed with care to remind you of who you are, what you are capable of and how much you rock.  (The first one is the most important.)  Enjoy!


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Ruby Slippers

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For most of my adult life I searched for inner peace outside of myself. I looked for it in relationships, in education, in jobs, in books, in workshops, in exercise, in food, in alcohol, in this, in that, in the other thing.  Did I mention baked goods…???

I searched and searched for the magic bullet, the ruby slipper that would take me home to my essence, my joy, the happy life I so desired.

Although I often felt like I was on the verge of greatness, my paradigms (those pesky buggers) always managed to keep me stuck in my story, in my circumstances, in my regrets from the past and my fears about the future.

There was a shadow or two residing deep inside of me that held me back. That kept me from experiencing the peace, joy and happiness I sought and now know I deserve.  There is an odd comfort in staying in the darkness.  We know it, it is familiar, we can relate to others because of it.  And, honestly, it may be an epic story.

My first born, my greatest teacher, taught me a lesson about staying in my story. That staying in my story kept my loved ones in the story as well.  He taught me that I really did have the Ruby Slippers I so desired.  All I needed to do was put them on.  Trust in the magic and I’d be on my way back home.

I am not perfect.  I am human. I am perfectly imperfect.  I sometimes lose track of my Ruby Slippers.  Think that I’ve lost them.  But now I know that they are always there for me.  They always fit. 

You have a pair too! Try them on.  They may feel a bit awkward at first, but I promise you will find your own way of wearing them.

Fun. Flow. Freedom.

Shine Brightly,

Tracy


* Do you need help finding your ruby slippers?  Start here with this complimentary series of Life By Design Daily Affirmations. These affirmations are designed with care to remind you of who you are, all that you are capable of and how much you rock.  (The first one is the most important.)  Enjoy!


Photo Credit:  © Sergey Kishan