How Are You Feeling?

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I spent most of my life wanting to feel good. Because…I didn’t. I felt awful.

About my circumstances.

About my life.

About myself.

I had little to no self awareness. I didn’t know that I had the power within me to change the way I was feeling.

And then I had kids. Wow! Having kids was like holding a magnifying glass over all that was “wrong” with my life. It was painful but it was the kick in the butt I needed to make some significant changes.

My kids were depending on me to dig in deep and BEcome the mom they deserved.

In the process I learned how to notice what I was noticing.

THE key to feeling good.

I learned how to check in and ask myself: How am I feeling? Am I feeling contraction or am I feeling expansion. 

A contractive feeling is the way fear, anger, frustration or the like feels.  For me, a contractive feeling almost feels like I want to protect myself.  Shoulders come in, I may cross my arms in a protective way.

An expansive feeling is the way joy, abundance or gratitude feels. For me, my heart feels open.  I feel expansion in my heart space.

If I am feeling expansive then I bask in the goodness.

If I am feeling contractive I ask myself this question: What thought am I having that is giving me this feeling? 

Maybe I am feeling the contraction of overwhelm and the thought I am having is “I have so much to do and so little time.” 

This is a great opportunity to change the thought.  To shift the thought from contraction to expansion.  The easiest way to shift from contraction to expansion is gratitude. 

Gratitude is the back door to abundance. 

Simply replace the contractive thought with something you are grateful for.  And, feel into it.  Feel the gratitude throughout your entire body.

You may even stand up taller and roll your shoulders up, back and down again.  Maybe even get into a power pose like Wonder Woman with your hands on your hips.  Take a deep, grateful breath.  Ahhh! 

How are you feeling?

Shine Brightly,

Tracy

P.S. Do you need help feeling better? I’ve created a FREE series of Life by Design Daily Affirmations to support you in feeling better one affirmation at a time. Click the button below to get started.

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How to Teach Your Kids Self-Love

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This may be a stretch for you and I know you have heard it before, but you must fill your cup first. This is the ultimate expression of self-love. And, this is how your kids learn self-love. They learn how to navigate life by watching you.

The woman you are BEcoming takes good care of herself. She honors her body, mind and soul. She
knows that her body, mind and soul are all connected. Neglect in one area affects the others. Take
good care of them all.

Start by becoming very attuned to the needs of your body, mind and soul and honor what you learn. You will need to cultivate self-love to properly respond.

And commit to a regular time of day for daily cup filling. Morning is really the best time but if it is not for you, choose a time that is.

  • Your body is a precious gift. It is yours. It was meant for you. Love it warts and all. We often take better care of our cars than we do our bodies. Send your body loving messages with the foods, activities and the care you give it. What does that look like for you?

  • Your mind. How are you treating your mind? Are you careless with your thoughts? Or do you stand guard at the portal of your mind? Feed your mind love, positivity and encouragement. Begin a daily affirmation practice. I AM the woman who…

  • And, your soul. How do you feed your soul? Does it need quiet reflection in meditation, connection with others, opportunities for creativity and fun? Spirit loves fun, you know. What does your soul need?

Take some time each day to contemplate the needs of your mind, body and soul and act upon what you learn. And as you learn to love yourself, you are teaching your kids to love themselves as well.

Shine Brightly,

Tracy

P.S. Do you need help loving yourself? I’ve created a FREE Daily Affirmation E-course to support you in increasing your deserving. Click the button below to get started.


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Gratitude and Why it Matters in Motherhood

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Gratitude is a powerful spiritual practice. If you don’t already have a gratitude practice, start one now. It will change your life. And, ultimately, change the lives of your children.

Gratitude is not only a beautiful practice for focusing on what is right in your world, but it also connects you with the source of abundance and helps you reconnect with the flow of life.

I like to call gratitude the back door to abundance.

You see, when you generate the expansive energy of gratitude, you are connected to source. Gratitude is at the same energetic frequency as abundance.

When you are dissatisfied, you generate contracted energy and disconnect from source. You create a kink in the hose so to say. Contraction is at the same energetic frequency as lack.

This is why it is so important for us, as mothers, to teach our children how to shift their thoughts from dissatisfaction to gratitude. I learned the hard way that I was teaching my children how to live a contracted life. I learned that they were learning how to navigate life by watching me. It was a painful lesson.

Below are a few practices I have incorporated into our family life. I am not perfect but I really do try to walk the walk with my kids.

  • I let them catch me writing in my gratitude journal

  • I encourage them to write in their own

  • I shift my thoughts from dissatisfaction to gratitude verbally so they can hear my thought process

And, years ago when my children were little, I started a bedtime ritual that I call the Grateful Prayer. Each night, I invite them to come up with 3 things they are grateful for. Sometimes (actually often), their gratitude consists of mommy and daddy but I always encourage them to reach a little deeper. To think about their day and remember all the goodness.

I invite you to incorporate one or a few of these practices into your family life and share your experience with a comment below.

Shine Brightly,

Tracy

P.S. Do you need help shifting your thoughts from dissatisfaction to gratitude? I’ve created a FREE Daily Affirmation E-course to support you in seeing all the goodness life has to offer. Click the button below to get started.


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FREE Daily Affirmation E-Course


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Raising Grateful Kids

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One night my 9 year old daughter was having a difficult time.  It had been a full week and we recently had to have a few difficult conversations with our children about death. 

My daughter, who has a vivid imagination, did NOT want to sleep in her bed.  She was not having any part of it.  By 10PM I realized that she was serious! 

So, I got her settled into my bed and took out my gratitude journal for me and my bedside notebook for her.  Her eyes lit up at the sight of the notebook as she is an artist in the making and draws any chance she can get.  I told her that instead of our nightly “grateful prayer”, as we call it, we were going to write in our gratitude journals to help us change our thoughts.

I was delighted with the experience for both of us and for the learning that took place that night.  She now has her own gratitude journal.  A simple solution with a powerful outcome. 

Gratitude is a powerful spiritual practice and an easy one to pass on to kids. Here are 3 reasons you and your child may want to start a gratitude practice.

  • Gratitude connects us to the source of abundance and creativity. Since our thoughts are prayers, gratitude is a great way to align with the source of all that is. That place of pure love.

  • Gratitude aligns us with the vibration (or vibe) of abundance. Seriously, gratitude has an energy about it. It vibrates at the same energetic frequency as joy and abundance leaving us feeling expansive while sadness, anger and frustration tend to leave us feeling constriction.

  • Gratitude increases our sense or feeling of deserving. It feels good to know that we have something to be grateful for.

Do you have a gratitude practice?  Do your kids? Please share it in the comments below.  Yours may just be the golden nugget that changes another mom’s life.

Shine Brightly,

Tracy

P.S. Do you need help thinking grateful thoughts? I’ve created a complimentary series of affirmations to remind you of who you are, all you are capable of and how much you rock.


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Seeing the Light

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When the sky is dark and stormy, it is hard to remember that the sun always shines.  We know this to be true, but sometimes it feels as if the sun will never come out.

There are moments like that in each of our lives.  As if the dark clouds of our circumstances will never shift and we will never see the light of day.  But, just as the sun always shines behind the stormy sky, our true and shining self is always there, behind the circumstances, calmly awaiting our choice to see the light.

It may feel very real, like we are bound by the dark clouds of our circumstances.  The truth is that we bind ourselves to the dark clouds.  We have choice in every moment.  To shift our thinking and choose to see the light.  Think of the power in that.


Try This:

  • *Breathe baby breathe  Breath is a powerful function.  It is both voluntary and involuntary.  It can be used to energize or it can be used to calm.  However you use it, it will always bring you back to NOW.  To the present moment.
  • *A Grateful Heart  Seek abundance and you shall find it.  Start a gratitude journal.  Make a point every day to find 3 things you are grateful for.  You will begin to see an abundance of beauty in the world when you are looking for it.
  • *Shifting Perception  It is unrealistic to move straight from anger to joy but you can choose to make small shifts in your perception.  You can choose to think:

I AM shifting into peace.  I AM shifting into joy.  I AM shifting into seeing the light.


Slight shifts in our thinking can completely change the trajectory of our lives.  One thought at a time.

Shine Brightly,

Tracy


Do you need help seeing the light?  Studies show that daily affirmations can help reduce stress, boost well-being and increase confidence.  Click the Daily Affirmations button below and get Life By Design Daily Affirmations in your inbox.  Designed with care to remind you of who you are, what you are capable of and how much you rock.  (The first one is the most important.)  Enjoy!


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Changing Your Mood with Gratitude

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The other night my 8 year old daughter was having a difficult time.  It had been a full week and we recently had to have a few difficult conversations with our children about death. 

My daughter, who has a vivid imagination, did NOT want to sleep in her bed.  She was not having any part of it.  By 10PM I realized that she was serious! 

So, I got her settled into my bed and took out my gratitude journal for me and my bedside notebook for her.  Her eyes lit up at the sight of the notebook as she is an artist in the making and draws any chance she can get.  I told her that instead of our nightly “grateful prayer”, as we call it, we were going to write in our gratitude journals to help us change our thoughts.

I was delighted with the experience for both of us and for the learning that took place that night.  She now has her own gratitude journal.  A simple solution with a powerful outcome. 


Try this:

  • Notice how you are feeling

  • Trace the feeling back to a thought

  • Bring to mind something that you are grateful for and feel it fully

Wash. Rinse. Repeat as needed.


Fun. Flow. Freedom.

Shine Brightly,

Tracy


*Do you need help changing your mood?  Start here with this complimentary series of Life By Design Daily Affirmations. These affirmations are designed with care to remind you of your awesomeness.  (The first one is the most important.)  Enjoy!


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Abundance

dsc_0230-640x427 It is so easy to fall into the appearance of lack.  When we focus on lack, that is exactly what we will see.  We will find every example of what is lacking in our lives and the world.

Lack of money.

Lack of time.

Lack of freedom to do what we truly desire.

It is just as easy to focus on abundance.  In fact, it may be even easier to focus on abundance than on lack.  All we need to do is step out into nature.  There is abundance all around us.

Just the other day my daughter and I were driving through the city and saw literally hundreds of birds sitting on rows of wires above the street.  Each in its own spot.  Chirping to its own tune.  Waiting for some unheard cue to move on to the next set of wires or fortunate tree.

What a blessing.  This thing called life.  It continues regardless of our circumstances.  Grass continues to grow, bunnies continue to multiply, hundreds of birds continue to migrate in unison from north to south each fall and spring.

Try this when you start going down the rabbit hole of lack

Stop.

Take a breath of life.

Be grateful.

Get outside.  Look for the abundance that surrounds you.  Take note of all that you have and you will begin to see more examples of the abundance in your life.

 

Discover. Empower. Balance.

Be Well,

Tracy

*Need help seeing abundance in your life?  Schedule a Fun Flow & Freedom Clarity Call today!

 

 

Rise and Shine

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Morning.  Early Morning.  Before my family wakes.  Is my favorite time of day.

In the quiet stillness.  The dawn of a new day of life.

It’s my time.  To fill my cup.  To feed my mind, my body and my soul.

It isn’t always easy, this rising and shining.  Many mornings I just don’t feel like leaving a delightful dream, the comfort of my bed, the warmth of my husband next to me.  But I have made a commitment to myself.  To my own self-care.  For making more time in the day just for me.

I am always rewarded.  Always grateful.  That I thought enough of me to give myself this gift of a morning.

My morning ritual has changed here and there.  With the needs of my soul.  With the season of my life.  With whatever I may be dabbling in at the time.  But the elements are pretty much the same.  They feed me, sustain me, give me the strength I sometimes need to move through my day.

My Absolute YES!

  1. A Brisk Walk to connect with nature and my own physical form
  2. Yoga to reunite my mind, body and soul
  3. Meditation to harmonize with my own life essence
  4. Gratitude to align myself with the generosity of the Universe
  5. Dreaming to explore the endless possibilities that are available to me

A new day.

A fresh start.

How glorious!

I can choose, this day, to see the world differently.

Wishing you well,

Tracy

Need help creating a meaningful morning ritual?  CLICK HERE to schedule a Fun Flow & Freedom Clarity Call.

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The Gift of Forgiveness

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gift_© Jinyoung Lee Dreamstime Stock Photos (640x461)

Do you ever find yourself returning to the same incident in your mind over and over again?  Maybe it happened an hour ago, 2 years ago, 20 years ago, maybe even in childhood?  You find yourself returning to the scenario, often spinning tall tales about how it could have been different, how it could have been avoided, what you should have said, how wrong the other person was.  You find yourself feeling resentment towards another person or yourself.  No matter how hard you try, you find it difficult to let it go.

Forgiveness is a natural remedy for resentment, regardless of how unnatural it may feel.  The word forgiveness can conjure up some strong emotions.  There is a misunderstanding that forgiveness means that we should release someone for doing something that may have even been a horrific act.  That we make whatever they did OK.  Forgiveness is NOT for the other person.  It is absolutely NOT to make whatever they did OK.

Forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves.  It is the gift of freeing up the valuable space in our minds that could be used for something constructive like solving problems, being present with another human being, feeling joy or creating dreams for our future.  It also frees us up from returning to those emotional and physiological feelings that just don’t feel good in our bodies and that can often be harmful.

I didn’t always know this.  As a matter of fact, I thought I had been “practicing forgiveness” for many, many, MANY years.  I couldn’t figure out why the resentment never really went away.  I now understand that forgiveness is a daily practice.  As long as we are breathing, we have something to forgive.  It’s like peeling back the layers of an onion.  We peel back a layer only to see that there is another layer behind it.

In the process of breaking apart my own life some years ago I learned some invaluable tools for forgiveness.  I had the good fortune of practicing my new tools on a person in my life with whom I was experiencing quite a bit of resentment.  Whenever this person came into my awareness, and at the time it was a lot, my throat would become constricted, my shoulders would drift toward my ears and I would begin to feel a defensive shift in my body, it was quite uncomfortable.  I realized one day, after I had been practicing my new tools daily, that I didn’t have that uncomfortable feeling as much anymore.  It was a marked difference for me.  It felt as if a weight had been lifted from me and I was able to see this person in a whole new light.

Ho'oponopono is one these practices.  It is an ancient Hawaiian practice of reconciliation and forgiveness.  It is simple but powerful.  It involves saying the following 3 phrases quietly in the mind, repeatedly.  Sometimes it takes a few rounds to feel the shift and sometimes it requires many.  Done regularly, it can change your life!

“I AM Sorry…Please Forgive Me”

“Thank you…I Am Grateful”

“I Love You”

By saying I’m Sorry…Please Forgive Me, I am acknowledging judgement and asking forgiveness for this judgement.

By saying Thank You…I AM Grateful, I am expressing gratitude for the opportunity to clear resentful thoughts.

By saying I Love You, I am generating a sense of joy, happiness and abundance.

Shine Brightly,

Tracy

Need help starting a forgiveness practice?  Schedule a Mini Clarity Session today!

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Yes!

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There has been a lot of buzz as of late about choosing a word of the year. Usually I have many but this year I chose Yes!  Actually, I have been dabbling in Yes! for several years, since I started breaking apart my life, but this year I’m all in!

At first it may feel a bit selfish to say Yes! A bit unnatural.  But once you get the hang of it you will wonder why you waited so long.  Yes! is exciting and terrifying all in one.  Yes! opens doors, renews relationships and frees you to be you.  Choosing Yes! gives your children permission to say Yes!  To be authentic.  To live their truth.

This year I say…

Yes! to my health.

Yes! to my family.

Yes! to my dreams.

Yes! to abundance.

And

Yes! to No!


If you haven’t yet, watch Oprah’s Super Soul Sunday interview with Shonda Rhimes, creator and producer of the award winning series Grey’s Anatomy and Scandal to name a few.  She recently wrote a book called Year of Yes: How to Dance It Out, Stand In the Sun and Be Your Own Person(now on my must read list). She made the bold move two years ago of saying Yes! to her life and it changed her in ways she could not have imagined.  Her year of Yes! lead her to some incredible experiences she would not have otherwise had, losing weight, letting go of what no longer served her and most importantly, showing up for her children as the empowered, present mama she is.

Thank you Shonda! For being brave, sharing your story with the world and being you!


Fun. Flow. Freedom.

Shine Brightly,

Tracy

*Do you need help saying YES to youSTART HERE with this complimentary series of Life By Design Daily Affirmations.  These affirmations are designed with care to remind you of who you are, all that you are capable of and how much you rock.  (The first affirmation is the most important.)  Enjoy!

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A Fond Farewell To 2015

Year End Reflection “Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change.” Wayne Dyer

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In the past few weeks I’ve taken some time to reflect on 2015, with compassion and gratitude. It was an eventful year.  A year full of many blessings, in disguise and outright.  And some real opportunities for growth.  I have come out of it with a greater understanding of myself and a new perspective on my life and the way I wish to proceed into the New Year.

With my previous awareness I would have called it a BIG YEAR. A year of the good, the bad and the ugly.  Accentuating the ugly.  It happened to be a year that was unusually full of circumstances.  Some created by me and others by the grace of the divine.  I am finally beginning to understand that it is only BIG if I label it as such.  If I call it BIG it becomes bigger than me.  It’s the thought about the circumstance that makes it bigger than me.  The circumstance is just a circumstance.  A circumstance is “the way something happens” as Encarta describes it.

In all of the decades of knowing this, by George, I think I am finally getting it! It hasn’t happened over night.  I still find myself getting stuck in the thought about a circumstance.  Grabbing ahold of that thought and telling myself a tall tale about that circumstance.  But, now, my recovery time is quicker.  I know that this is a never ending process.  The redirection of my thoughts.  The lesson of a lifetime.  But I am grateful for the awareness and the opportunity to practice.

So…get out your calendar from 2015, a pen and your journal. Take a close look at the events that unfolded.  Journal it out.  Do a mind-dump.  Then, find the good in each circumstance.  Find the hidden blessings.  Rewrite last year’s story with compassion for the woman who experienced those circumstances and thank her for where she is today.

Wishing you well

Tracy

Do you need help rewriting last year's story?  Click Here to schedule your Mini Clarity Session today.

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"We Can't Redo Life Mommy"

A Six Year Old’s Words of Wisdom "The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience." – Eleanor Roosevelt

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My son, who was born at least 40 years old, said this when he was 5 or 6.  I have spent the past 8 years writing quotes from my children on scrap pieces of paper to do what with I am not quite sure but this quote, “we can’t redo life mommy”, is posted on my wall so I can see it every morning when I wake.  He has surprised me from the moment he started talking with the depth of his thinking and the insight he brings to my world.  His first word was clock.  Not mum or dada or dog or tat, but clock?!?

I can’t remember the context from which the quote came but I do remember the impact.  Have I lived?  If I were to die tomorrow or 50 years from now for that matter, how would I want to be remembered by my children?  How did my life impact them and how did my life impact their children?  Will they want to follow in my footsteps or will I be a faint memory of brown hair and blue eyes?

As I pondered this quote I made a list of all of the ways I’d like to be remembered… as a loving, happy, present, caring, compassionate, patient, wise, strong, playful, fun, funny, forgiving, grateful, giving, tender mother who makes a difference in the lives she touches. Most importantly, though, I want to be remembered as a mother who loved her life.  I want to be an inspiration to my children to love their lives.  This might have been the moment when I started breaking my life apart, inspecting it piece by piece under a microscope, and vowing to live the next half of my life much differently than the first if only to be an inspiration to my children.  I don’t recommend doing this all at once, as I did, as it really rocks the world of those around you and once it’s out it can’t be stuffed back in.  I know this…I tried!  I’m still working on it but I love my life so much more these days as I make a conscious effort to live authentically in hopes that my children will do the same.

Wishing you well.

Tracy

Do you need help living authentically?  Click Here to schedule your Mini Clarity Session today.

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